When a wife has been wounded by her husband's choices, many emotions come to the forefront. Anger is one of them. It is natural and expected and if handled correctly can be healthy. However, as time goes by and the road to restoration is marked by setbacks and obstacles, anger that is not dealt with can easily be turned towards God. It is a trap set by the enemy....why? Because this misplaced anger will only create more confusion and cause the wounded wife to turn FROM the only ONE who can bring her hope, healing, and beauty for ashes. Been there, done that! What about you?
Let's be real. You and I don't set out to do this....it just begins to happen. You may have spent hours pouring your broken heart out to Jesus, pleading and even begging Him to "fix" your mess. In the midst of such pain, blame shows up and shifts from one place to another eventually landing on the ONE whom you gave and trusted your heart to. After all, all you ever wanted was to be happily married, to serve God and to be a Godly wife to a Godly husband. Now what?
Can I tell you, sweet friend, God did not cause your brokenness! Furthermore, He has not ignored your prayers for your husband's deliverance and the restoration of your marriage. His heart is breaking with yours. You see, your husband is His son, and he was His son way before he was your husband. He loves him even MORE than you do. He has a plan for his life, a plan for good to give him a hope and a future. You can be assured that He desires for your husband to walk FREE....free from addiction and the things that have the potential to destroy him.
Can I encourage you to re-position your anger away from God and even your husband and recognize who your real enemy is! He is out to destroy you, your husband, your marriage, and your family. His name is satan. Precious one, rise up and be the warring princess God has called you to be. Your battle is not against flesh and blood (your husband) but the enemy of your soul. Don't you see it? If we can only get a hold of this our lives would look so much different. Think about Jesus and his experience in the wilderness. Satan came at him fully trying to cause him to doubt not only his own identity but the character of God, as well. He did this with Eve in the garden, as well. Satan will, no doubt, use the same tactics against us. If He can get you to doubt God and His goodness, He has got you right where he wants you! What did Jesus do...did he turn on God and blame him for the excruciating cross he was about to bear? No, He spoke the Word of God and held firm to what he knew to be TRUE! That is what we must do.
SO, you may be asking; "why doesn't God just "fix" my husband, change my husband, and deliver my husband?" My friend, I don't have all the answers or claim to know the mind of God but what I do know is that He is the God of great mercy and patience. He is MORE than able to do above and exceedingly beyond more than you can think for imagine, but first things first.
More than deliverance, God wants your husband's heart ..... AND he wants YOU to trust Him with yours!
Sweet friend, won't you talk to Jesus about your situation? Don't wait any longer! Instead of allowing anger to separate you from Him....use it as a springboard to RUN to Him! Here is a prayer to get you started......
Lord, Jesus....thank you that you are such a gracious God! Thank you that even though my heart is broken and I can't think or see clearly I can know that you are still in control. Lord, thank you for how far you have brought us and for where you are taking us. Thank you that you love me and my husband with an everlasting love. Help me to live with my heart fully abandon to you and you alone. Forgive me for listening to the lies of the enemy and the misplaced anger I have placed on you and even others. God, thank you for your mercy!! Lord, may your TRUTHS silence the voices and lies that feed my brokenness so that your healing may be complete in me. Thank you, Lord that you have plans to give me a hope and a future that is good. Lord, help me to surrender my heart, my life, my husband, and my marriage to you every day. Lord, you know how I am hurting, you know all about my situation. The struggles, the setbacks....Lord none of these things are too difficult for you. I ask that you turn all things together for good as your Word has promised. Help me to keep my eyes on you and not my husband. Lord, show me your Glory and grace like I have never experienced before.
I pray for my husband, I pray God, that you would deliver him and set him free but more than that God, I pray that He would know your love in a deeper more intimate way. Lord, reveal yourself to Him so that everything else pales in comparison to YOU. I pray that He would have a hunger and thirst for righteousness and find fulfillment and satisfaction in you alone. Thank you that when he is weak and struggling, God YOU are strong and will enable him to overcome.
Help me, Lord to be the wife you have called me to be...even when it hurts, even when it is uncomfortable. Help me to not be selfish but to have a heart that loves as you love. Lord, you know how difficult this journey of restoration can be. I know that I cannot do it without you. I need you Lord every moment of every day. Lord, I pray that no matter what happens that my heart will be content and secure knowing that I am your daughter and that you will never leave me nor forsake me. Lord, if you never did another thing for me you have already shown me how much you love me by the extravagant love you demonstrated at the cross. Help me to never lose sight of that and to remember that my eternal future is secured by your amazing love and grace! These trials and struggles are nothing to compare to what you have in store for my future.
Lord I thank you that you are my ROCK, my STRONG TOWER, my REFUGE and that my heart is safe with you! I thank you that your peace will guard my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus. Thank you that your love never fails and will never, EVER give up on me or those that I love.
Thank you, Lord for renewed hope! Lord, I praise you and give all Glory and Honor to YOU, my Savior, Redeemer, and soon and coming KING! Be Glorified in my life today and in every season that we walk through. In the mighty name of Jesus, Amen!!